Sunday, October 06, 2013


All the trains on one track. Had to cosign a Latino dude's explaining to white people. The white people start cheering hurray! for somebody on the stairs. They're all chatting now, and I accidentally make eye contact with some dude who's trying to sell the rest on going to Big Wangs in NoHo. I shake my head; he says, "He knows what I'm talking about." It's not happening. I'm not cosigning that.

They keep cheering. I ask if it's someone's birthday. They guy says yeah, but they'll cheer at anything. I say, "It's easy to feel enthusiastic about public transit."

I've had the kind of night with an open bar and the crashing of a bat mitzvah (in a morally edifying way). Mike and his FBI roommate are good role models and answer questions while I bond with some 13-year-old named Josh about the Walking Dead and Avatar: Legend of Kora.

The crowd in the subway's from the Midwest; someone's demanding of a chubby bearded guy if he was "In Michigan on a Target binge."

First guy yells, "It's a train!"
Second guy yells, "That or a Highlander!"
First girl yells, "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!"

Some kid on the train looks like my platonic ideal of Darius, fat and high, with a metal t-shirt and a canvass elephant bag that says, "Don't forget — Reuse!" He looks baked and environmentally conscious.

That same group got on my train.
First girl: "Oh man, Star Wars!"
First guy: "Actually, Shaft."
First girl: Oh yeah!"
First guy: "They transition, actually."
First girl: "Yeah, yeah."

God, someone who specializes in artisinal muggings could make a killing at this station.

I keep trying to not walk right behind the birthday girl from that group, like, wow, what's that new Jon's signage I've never admired from across the street before? but she keeps slowing down more and more the closer we get to Hollywood. I turn towards Cheetah's instead.

There's a limo across the sidewalk at Cheetah's, some fat guy in a shiny shirt with one button buttoned and plenty of tanned, hairless belly is pouring out of the door as I walk up and he says loudly, "I'll show you Silverlake!" and points at me, a drunk guy in a suit with a holographic paper tophat.